Alaska Me

Well My Parents Are Officially THOSE People

2011-07-08T09:38:00.000-07:00

Mom and Don and the Three Danes Inn have officially started on their maiden voyage. Their blog is listed to the right under the blogs that I read. It really is rather funny I suggest you stop in and read it.

However my parents have offically become RVers! I think we can start calling them snow birds now and get away with it. Below is a picture that mom posted on her blog of Don driving and the all three danes riding SHOT GUN! You can barely see Rosie since she is the only black one in the bunch (eyeballs and teeth) but she is right next to Don she just sort of blends in - mom needs to get a flash on that there camera of hers.

This weekend I will be having my first BBQ of the year. It's going to be a busy weekend. After work today I have to go get all the food and then I still have to clean the house (especially since there is currently I queen size mattress residing in my living room) plus I have to do some pre-cooking and all that has to happen tonight.

Towmorrow I have to get up early to do a tour pickup from Whittier which will be from 7AM to about Noon. Then I might have time for a breif nap before I have to get up and get my party on. I don't have to drive on Sunday since I told them I plan on suffering from a hangover on Sunday and will not be able to drive and be perky.

Checking In

2011-06-28T16:55:00.000-07:00

OK well so I haven't posted anything in forever! But that doesn't mean that I have died. just really busy at work and at home. I have currently been reading a ton of books when I do have down time because let's face it summer time television SUCKS! I promise to be more proactive in the posting from here on out.

Almost Done With The Kitchen

2011-02-25T16:44:00.001-08:00

So mom was just up here this last week and she repainted the picture on my kitchen wall below is what it use to look like. Once I finish up the touch up this weekend I will take better pictures of the kitchen once it is completely done.

SEXY

2011-01-26T16:06:00.000-08:00

So I am taking some pictures to Walmart to have them printed - they shouldn't have a problem printing this photo for me - RIGHT? (yes this is an old picture from a couple years ago during my ethiopian looking days.)

I am wearing more then I do out at Big Lake in the summer. So I should be good to go.

Also I just got my iphone in the mail yesterday and I plan on getting it activated tomorrow - I had to have Mells Bells setup my itunes account because I am just not that savy when it comes to that crap. I am already thinking that this iphone thing might be to much phone for me. Like that one commercial when that fuzzy orange thing passes out after touching that one phone - that will be me. Although it will be nice to take pictures and send them to my self since I don't have a digital camera anymore to use. I am sensing alot of random blogging in my future.

This Week

2011-01-21T11:27:00.000-08:00

So this week started off below zero - this SUCKED it shouldn't physically hurt when you go outside but it did. So now it is warmer and I am feeling better about that.

I went over to Lexie's house this week and I stopped by to get some dinner at the Ghetto Carrs and some JackAss totally blocked my drivers side door which required me to crawl in and over from the passenger side - I almost stopped and pee-ed on his wheels but it was still to cold to do that.

I have taken on the job of becoming Lexie's personal assistant / accountant. So this should be fun but I will have her straightened out in no time.

Mom added me to her family plan so now I am getting an iphone - woohoo! I finally get to upgrade from my fabulously outdated Krazor which I love but it is falling apart. So WARNING I will be able to take pictures and send them to everyone - the possiblities are ENDLESS! Are you scared - well you should be.

Currently I don't have any big plans for the weekend - I am going to be working some overtime and I am currently totally engrossed in the newest Dan Brown book so I plan on working and reading all weekend.

"I DO I DO"

2011-01-10T14:18:00.000-08:00

Who gets supremely drunk that they throw up that night and then again two more times the next day - when they are out BOWLING of all things?

We all know I am a special kind of stupid but geez!

Anyway - hope everyone else had an easier weekend then I did - and if you were wondering no it did not help my bowling score being drunk and my bowling fingers hurt.

2011-01-04T13:52:00.000-08:00

So here is what the kitchen looks like now. Isn't it fabulous - I am totally in love with it. I think it is very posh. I am holding off on doing the rest until I can get my new TV and then I will repaint that wall as well. Plus since Pucky is spending today at the vet because she has not been feeling very well I am waiting to make sure I have the money to pay to get her back before going on and doing anything else.

The Last Two Weeks

2011-01-04T13:05:00.001-08:00

So this is what my kitchen use to look like - so over the Christmas holidays I took some time off and redid the painting. It was horrible it took forever. Now this first picture was taken during the day so it looks brighter but it is still bright in there now.

Graham Norton

2010-12-07T17:12:00.000-08:00

OMG! I love this man. He is absolutely fabulous! I love a talk show that actually makes me laugh all the way through it. Some of the things that come out of his mouth.

I just had to say that!

It's Freezing Up Here!

2010-11-16T11:46:00.000-08:00

So in keeping with my obession with my boobs lately - hello! Yes I actually wore this shirt out to the bar - I have worn it on two different occassions.

I have started a new beauty routine evey Monday night is my beauty night and I have this salt scrub and awesome body cream I have been using and my ass is a soft as a baby's butt. Actually my whole body is soft and with my new hair I have been treating that too and so that is super soft too. I am just all around silky.

It sure does make a girl feel better when she can be all smooth and sexy. Although it is winter time so the effect is short lived and I really have to use lotion every day - or I want to scratch my shins off because they get so dry. It's 18 degrees so I am avoiding the outdoors as much as possible. Thanksgiving is coming up and I can't wait to strap on the feed bag.

See We Clean Up Nice

2010-11-10T12:46:00.000-08:00

Lexie and I dressed up to go to a seminar with her dad and Mark. Hey look everyone she is more blonde then me - who knew. Still really busy with boring things to blog long.

OMG

2010-11-08T18:00:00.000-08:00

Seriously my day started with a “Good Morning” text from Alexis at 6:15am this morning – she was still in Seattle which saved her – but pay back will be a bitch.

It took me 12 minutes to leave my neighborhood because it was snowing all night and so a 25 minute commute to work (3.5 miles) apparently 8 cars decide to ditch it on the New Seward Highway. I pull into work to red and blue lights flashing off the snow. Because there was a fire engine, ambulance and a cop car in front of our building. I park and then ask my boss who is standing outside what has happened and apparently one of our technicians rear ended someone and the guy (who apparently just had surgery for a brain aneurism a week ago) was not doing so well after the fender bender. Over all not a lot of damage to the vehicles and our technician is emotionally not handling the incident very well (who could blame him) the other guy left in the ambulance – hopefully he will be OK.

Then I had to drive the same technician to drop his vehicle off at the shop to get it worked on. So more driving then I prefer to do in weather like this. Anyway was busy all day but can’t really say I completed anything – hopefully tomorrow will be more productive. Will check in later when I have more time.

Halloween 2010!

2010-11-05T16:23:00.000-07:00

OK only have time to add picture - will post more next week.

Obviously this is me dressed as a Circus Ring Master - however maybe I should say I am Cher!

UPDATE

2010-10-25T17:36:00.000-07:00

OK since the last time I posted this is what has happened.

Saturday 16th – Had a jewelry party at Alexis’s but she wok my butt up early so that I could go and get a 6 foot Uncle Fester statue thingy from Courtney’s house. So in my jammies I ran over there and loaded up this monster into my jeep and then went back home to get ready to go over to Lexie’s – arrived early at Lexie’s and helped her setup for the party then I had to bail out at 5PM to head out to the valley for Seamus’s 1st birthday party. Was out there for a couple hours and then headed back in to town mean while Uncle Fester kept unnerving me staring at me while I drove. So went over to Lexie’s boyfriends house to drop him off and have a nice soak in his hot-tub. Then went home.

The work week was insanely busy and I am still trying to get caught up – but since they laid off the receptionist it’s probably only going to get busier at work.

Friday 22nd – Went and had my haired colored (THAT”S RIGHT NO MORE BLONDE) my hair is now dark brown with a couple of blonde highlight on the top. I will post a picture when I can get one.

Saturday 23rd – Went over to Mama Jenn’s house had dinner and curved a pumpkin which looks way more fun then it actually is my hand started to cramp up.

Which bring me to now. I am going to go home soon.

P.S. I have had several compliments on my new hair color everyone likes it better and is saying I look better and younger even so that’s all GOOD!

Weird and Strangeness!

2010-10-13T11:48:00.001-07:00

I have been having very unusual dreams lately I know they are weird but I can’t really seem to hang on to them long enough after I wake up to delve into their possible deeper meanings.

“It hovers on the edge of my mind right at the edge of the blackness popping in and out of thought as if to tease me that it has a secret and it’s not going to let me in on the joke until it’s had the first laugh.”

No I Am Not Dead!

2010-10-07T17:47:00.000-07:00

Just SUPER busy at work! So in parting I will leave you with this picture of a "Baby PUCKY" she is like twelve times that size now and seriously gray! And YES her mothers name was Piglet - so hold the ROLL-O comments from the peanut gallery - she is absolutly adorable just the way she is.

BOLO!

2010-09-22T12:00:00.000-07:00

Be on the look out for these two escaped Tiger’s. If spotted do not approach as these two are currently in heat, are over agitated and are carrying a very serious virus. If bitten or scratched seek medical attention immediately.

Warning signs of virus infection are as follows:

~ Amped up sexual urges.
~ An uncontrollable desire to mark your territory.
~ Loss of memory followed by vomiting.
~ Sprouting unwanted hair in usually hairless places.

If you have had contact with these animals and are currently bouncing off the walls or are experiencing any of the symptoms listed above please admit yourself to the Psychiatric Ward immediately. You can contact the CDC for further information.

We have BABY!

2010-09-21T12:01:00.000-07:00

Just got the call from Lexis - baby has been born. She had no information at this time regarding details. She just said baby was out and she was going in. So I will get more info when I go over there on my lunch break and then update when I get more information.

Update: OK Mama Jenn with Baby (7 pounds even 20 inches) - kind of short isn't he. But he's a cutie - and no I can't remember the name she picked out right now.

P.S. On a side note the PFD is going to be $1,281.00 this year - woohoo - not to exciting for me since it going right to my debt but oh well.

Rain Man

2010-09-20T11:32:00.000-07:00

OMG! My mother just sent me this picture. First it’s de..def..defin..itly needs an explanation!

My dad is a PE teacher in Seattle. Apparently the day this was taken they were scheduled to take the kids for a walk/run. Well the weather being what it is in Seattle was a mini monsoon! So Donald thinking it would be funny and because he is most of the time quite and shy is secretly sadistic, he dressed up like this and told the kids “OK lets go!”

I wish my PE teacher had been this funny – then maybe PE wouldn’t have been such a drag. I also now realize that it’s a shame my mother didn’t meet him until after I was grown up then again it was I that picked him out for her. Us Rah-Tards have to stick together ya know. So here is my shout out to my daddy. Isn’t he FABULOUS! Runway models of the world fear for your jobs!

FOG and Hair Crack

2010-09-16T18:01:00.000-07:00

So here is a picture of my hair – it’s usually really frizzy. But mom sent me up some Moroccan Oil so I used it today and it already 50% better. I am in love with this stuff.

Also for the last two days it has been super foggy like pea soup. I had an adrenalin rush this morning pulling out of my neighborhood because I have to cross two lanes of traffic and then turn left. I was hoping everyone was driving with their lights on and took a deep breath and then went for it.

I went to lunch today with Lexie and Mells Bells completely pigged out – it was nice.

Bored!

2010-09-14T17:20:00.000-07:00

Not a whole lot going on. This is what happens to the dog when I get bored can you tell that he is not happy! I think he’s a little embarrassed.

I totally rearranged my office today I figured after 9 months it was about time I unpacked and settled in. Ex-Rommate Sam called me and took me to lunch today. So we had a nice chat and I got to whine to him about being bored and having no long term goals anymore. I am almost completely caught up at work which is a good thing since we will have some company this week. Rumors Rumors Rumors.

I'm certain that given a cape and a nice tiara, I could save the world.

2010-09-09T16:54:00.000-07:00

The title to this blog is a qoute that I have on the bottom of my signature for my work e-mails. just stating the obvious!

Everyone meet ANNER BOO! She is technically Lexie's parents dog, but lexie has her sometimes. In this picture she is riding shot gun in the cab of Lexie's dad's heliocopter! She is ready to go and would probably perfer to drive. This is the funniest picture because DAD outfitted her in this get up and apparently when they got the dog he said something about not walking her because she wasn't a real dog or something like that. Now to the dismay of Lexie's mother the dog rides shot gun in the helio and if MOM would allow it she would always ride shot gun in the car too. Wait for further updates on SUPER PUPS SECRET ADVENTURES she is currently deep in negotiations with the CIA.

NOW ON TO ME:

OK so Tuesday night I get a call from Mama Jenn at 3AM asking me to come over because she has been having contractions and needs to go to the hospital and she needs someone to stay with the kids. I round up my stuff and head over – she is sitting on the stairs right inside the door when I get there so I send her off after making sure she will be fine driving to the hospital by herself. I go down stairs and crawl into her nice comfy bed and go back to sleep. 6:30 in the morning I hear some movement upstairs and I figure it is just her brother Adam coming home from work (he works the graveyard shift) so I doze back off because me and the kids still have 30 more mins. Beside Adam usually gets the kids up in the morning and ready for school. At 7:05am Jenn comes walking around the corner in her room with a cinnamon bun and a cup of coffee.
Me to Jenn: What are you doing here and why are you still pregnant?
Apparently we had a false alarm and she figured I deserved breakfast in bed since she woke me up at 3AM.

Awesome – honestly for breakfast in bed I will always come over at 3AM. Yes my heart is in my stomach.

So as I am leaving for work she gives me a BBQ Pork sandwich to take for lunch (I am so in LUST with her right now).

Wednesday – WORK SUCKED! Went home and vacuumed the whole house including the stairs then went to bed early.

Thursday – WORK STILL SUCKS! I am tired of babysitting grown ass men!

But at least tonight I get to go over to Lexie’s house for dinner.

COUCH!

2010-09-07T12:20:00.001-07:00

So this is how my weekend went.

Friday: I met Lexie after work to help her pick out a couch. This is the one we decided on it is the most comfy couch ever and because it is in pieces you can configure it many different way. So I also fell in love with this couch and will be purchasing it when I save up some money which will be after I pay off something’s first so it might be a whole year before I get this couch but it is fabulous. (This is not the best picture of me but whatever the couch is awesome). Then we went out for dinner and then I went home and cleaned my bedroom.

Saturday: Found me going over to Lexie’s house at around noon – I hung out over there watching movies and just vegging (she brought her bed mattress out into the living room so we could just lay around).

Sunday: Saturday night didn’t sleep hardly at all was up at 3:30AM on Sunday morning for like 4 hours and then went back to bed. Then Travis and baby Seamus came over for a few hours and hung out.

Monday: Kelly and Travis woke me up at 9AM because they were on their way over with baby because I was going to babysit for the day. So baby and I took a two hour nap around noon. Then they came back and we went and hung out over at Lexie’s house for a bit.

So over all not an exciting weekend but at least I didn’t spend any money. So props to me.

Yipee 3-Day Weekend!

2010-09-03T15:28:00.001-07:00

So I realized that there needs to be some introductions made. I refer to several people in my blogs so I think it is time we pictured some of them here.

World meet Alexis (otherwise known as Lexie) she is my life partner we usually talk every day and yet sometimes we can go months without seeing each other. She knows EVERYTHING! Seriously this girl has even seen me cry which doesn't happen often. She knows I am a freak and she loves me anyway. She usually post comments but doesn't have an account so she just puts BFF after it. This is a sexy picture of her - which doesn't show how nuts she is but you get the point.

Alexis was the first person I met when I first moved up here that wasn't a co-worker. Her and her parents took me in and I have never been the same since. We have had some very interesting adventures together she even moved in with me for a few months shortly after I moved up here and like all of my roommates have said I am like living with a guy. What can I say I like zoning out in front of the TV. Pucky knows her as the "Lexie Monster" which envolves her chasing Pucky around the couch, she is also one of the few other people that Pucky will snuggle with besides me. "CAB!"

So the other person who is featured lately on my blog is Mama Jenn. I was introduced to her by Mikey who invited her and her family over to my house when I had a BBQ and I haven't been able to get rid of her since. If it wasnt for her I would have most certainly starved to death by now. Jenn met my mother over a year ago and decided that she would take her. So as repayment she feeds me and makes me chicken for my birthday. Her kids have sort of become my sudo family and Jenn lets me boss them around when I get on a power trip.

Even more recently Jenn and Lexie have become fast friends - which no matter how much I tease them about being jealous - it works out fabulously because they are both needy and I can't keep up with them. So Lexie is Jenn's wifey and I am more like the husband in this threesome of a relationship.

All in all these two are my girls and without them I would be completely bored. Plus they keep me laughing like you wouldn't believe and they aren't scared by my raunchy sense of humor no matter how crude it gets. So much love to my girls.

Now I don't currently really have any big plans for the weekend I think it will mostly be us all just lounging around. hope everyone has a save and FABULOUS weekend!

Halloween Is Two Months Away!

2010-09-01T11:49:00.000-07:00

So last year I went as a she devil because I didn’t have time to really put thinks together. This year I am planning ahead – I have decided to go as wonder woman (I was inspired by a rerun of a BONES episode plus I already have the shiny red boots). So I have discussed with MOM and she is going to make something for me. So on that note I will leave you with a picture from last year.

This is Lexie, Poppy and I.

While Lexie does look fabulous lets stop and take a look for a moment at my right breast. It looks absolutely fabulously perfect from this angle!

Sorry I had to stop and feel myself up for a moment – I am very proud and aware of my breast when I look at this photo. Sigh!

Takin A Ride On The Crazy Train!

2010-08-30T17:12:00.000-07:00

Ok so this is how my weekend went.

Friday: Went to bed early because I had to get up at 8AM on Saturday morning.

Saturday: We planned Mama Jenn’s Baby Shower on Saturday at noon. It was a surprise so I was tasked with getting Jenn out of her house by ten so that her friend from out of town could decorate without her knowing. So I got up at 8AM because I was originally going to pick her up then since Alexis was coming too she picked her up and then we met up for manicures and pedicures.

Then we (they) did some shopping at the mall and then we all headed back to Jenn’s house for the SURPRISE! There was a pretty good turn out. We had Mamosa’s and breakfast foods. It was good I left at 3PM and then went home and vegged for the rest of the weekend.

Today Mama Jenn brought me flowers since I helped her out last week with watching the kids while she was in the hospital. She didn’t need to do that but since she was all dressed up and looking HOT I was glad I got to see her. Her due date isn’t until September 9th but she says she is ready anytime now. So we are all just waiting……..

AArguh!

2010-08-24T17:47:00.000-07:00

Ok so my weekend:

Friday night found me over at Lexie’s house so she could color my hair (my roots were BADDY BAD BAD). Then just when I was about to go home Mama Jenn was over there and she decided to start having contractions. So once we talked her into going into the hospital to have it checked out we then proceeded to spend three hours at the hospital to find out that she wasn’t drinking enough water. Well it was late and I was getting cranky so dropped Jenn and Lexie off at her house and went home but couldn’t get to sleep until like 3:30AM.

Saturday evening I went over to a BBQ at Michelle’s house and hung out over there for a few hours. Jesse Pooh brought this redneck golf game which was mildly entertaining to watch and I got to be the score keeper for that. Marissa (from Seattle) and Rob drunk called me Saturday night – she was out celebrating her 30th birthday (Welcome to the Club Sista!) so that was fun I got to listen to them order Jack In The Box which made me really want a Sour Dough Jack – to bad we don’t have those up here.

Sunday I vegged all day.

I just had a visit from Kelly, Travis and the baby Seamus he is getting so big he is going to be 1 year old on October 14 so I will be attending that birthday party for sure.

Much Love to Everyone

P.S.
The Aarguh – is because I had a pissy moment at work and wanted to throw something but seeing the baby made it all better.

Just Checking In

2010-08-20T16:31:00.000-07:00

Nothing new an exciting really going on. I got all my chores done this week including giving the dogs a bath and cleaning the carpets. Tonight I have to clean the offices and then I am going over to Lexie’s to have her color my hair. This weekend will be another repeat of me locked in my house because I have no money. Maybe I will actually get around to watching the NetFlix movies I have had at my house for over a month.

P.S.
Yoda is nuts he has started peeing while walking when going outside – I think this is the ultimate of laziness it reminds me of an old man or something. Then yesterday he was taking a crap and he was actually pumping his leg like he was trying to pump it out. It had me giggling most of the evening because he is such a Rah-tard!

zzzzzzzzz

2010-08-16T17:27:00.000-07:00

So this last weekend found me over at Lexie’s house on Friday trying to keep her motivated to decorate her house now that the painting is all done. She finally hung some stuff on the walls and Mama Jenn organized some of her nic nacks so that once she gets furniture to put it all on she will have stuff. Plus I stayed late to do her laundry so I could make sure she put it all way before I left then I went home to sleep and then called her up at noon on Saturday and told her I was coming over to just hang out. So vegged over there for the rest of the day.

Sunday I stayed home and vegged and didn’t get anything done.

Tonight I plan on cleaning my own house and busting out with the carpet cleaner if I can get that all done then I will feel better and can just relax and be a total slug and do nothing for the next two weeks since I am broker than broke until the end of August.

I also plan on washing the dogs I’m sure they are going to love that but at least they will smell better and it’s been over a year since either of them had a bath.

Pasties!

2010-08-12T16:35:00.000-07:00

So went out last Saturday night! Had a blast – there was a burlesque show at Kootz. So I went with a co-worker Jesse Pooh and his family and friends. Did a couple shots at the house before he came and picked me up and then headed for the bar. Once there got called up on stage with other girls to dance and strut my stuff – wasn’t nearly drunk enough for that but thanks to the guys in our party had some liquid courage and with the help of some spray on glitter I was able to work it. Then got buzzed enough I whined to Jesse Pooh to buy me some pasties. He did and I put them on in the bathroom and then proceeded to flash half the bar for the rest of the night to show them off. Met some new people and took a cab home (talked to Kelly on the phone don’t remember that).

Sunday morning woke up at 6AM with something stuck to me – Hello Pasties! Peeled those off and removed rest of clothes that were still on then went back to sleep. Woke up around 8AM and proceeded to call everyone and wake them up and whine to them to come over and let my dogs out because I didn’t want to move at all. (Eventually I got up and let them out and then we went back to bed). Must have bugged the crap out of Lexie and Mama Jenn because they called me needy and whiny. Oh well! Monday night washed my bedroom sheets for some reason there was glitter all over them – who knew?

So not going out this weekend have no plans as of yet – but I didn’t have plans for last weekend either so we will see what happens.

P.S. I have been going to that bar for over 7 years and have managed to never flash my shit (even for Spenardy Gras) and low and behold buy me some pasties and it’s on like Donkey Kong!

Short Short Version

2010-08-05T12:55:00.000-07:00

Well where to start? At least I stopped blogging on a high note – yeah for me.

Believe it or not there has not been a whole lot of going out partying hence the weight gain. I am currently in save money mode so I usually lock myself in my house so I don’t spend any money.

Last Labor Day – my dad came up and helped me build a deck it’s fabulous! I got a few people to help or more like DO while I supervised. I even made Kelly the pregnant wench do some manual labor. Her extra body weight was good for standing on things holding them down.

Kelly had baby Seamus in October and her mother stayed with me for a few days while Kelly was in the hospital I went over every night while she was there to totally mooch on my new favorite man – he’s so darn cute and at that stage he couldn’t run away. HA!

My personal life is still chaos me and Poppy are still orbiting each other and at least mom and dad got to meet him when they came up for Thanksgiving. I made Mama Jenn do the cooking last year for Thanksgiving taking my family over and invading her house – she loved every minute of it even when dad drank all the milk – he’s not a big talker but when it comes to milk he can drink you under the table.

Christmas was blessedly quite and no one came and I refused to go anywhere – it was nice.

March had Taylor moving in to be roommate number one. I hardly ever see him, he not around which is good for a roommate that’s how I like them.

May had be dismantling my California closet in the 3rd bedroom so I could rent that out.

Mom came back up for the weekend on June 12th to do a breast cancer walk with me and my friends and co-workers. We had a BBQ using the new huge ass BBQ grill dad bought me (thank goodness we built a bigger deck because the grill wouldn’t have fit on the old one). It was a busy weekend and I sent mom home tired to much going on in one weekend.

Chris roommate number two moved in beginning of July.

The picture posted below is of Cliffy and I dancing in Jesse’s kitchen I made $60 that night thanks for that cab fare. Usually the group of us hang out at each others houses because it’s cheaper then going out to drink.

Although I did go out with Alexis last weekend and we had a blast and then there was some good snuggle time the following morning with Alexis and I and a pregnant Mama Jenn. We barely fit in Alexis’s double bed. Everyone else had more motivation then I did and went out and did things while I stayed home the rest of the weekend suffering from a mild hangover.

Grandma came up and visited two weeks ago and stayed for ten days we pretty much just vegged although I am pretty sure we made daily trips to Walmart – it’s sort of Grandma’s thing and she spoiled me rotten.

Well that for the most part catches you up and I will be blogging more now. I have all new gripes mostly about my new white trash neighbors and their dog who keeps crapping in my yard. Haven’t been big on dressing up for work in forever so my goal for tomorrow is to gasp! Do my hair and makeup – I’ll let you know how it goes.

Their Baaaack!

2010-08-05T12:17:00.000-07:00

So as you can tell from the photo I have gained back 30 of the 50 pounds I lost three years ago. But I like it because my butt came back to me and my boobs look better! Yahoo!

I will add another post once I get something typed up and remember how to work this darn thing.

I have to regress my memory to figure out any big highlights (besides my hair) that have happened since the last post oh so long ago.

OMG! I Had A Girlie Moment

2009-05-06T12:28:00.001-07:00

OK so last Sunday was one of the happiest days of my life – I reverted to being totally girlie and romantic and shit. So I won’t post the details of my weakness. I will just say it was a great night and leave it at that. However with this new development comes emotional issues that I will have to deal with but I will be taking that one day at a time.

On a side note I am wearing my cute yellow high heel shoes today so I feel fabulously adorable.

Saturday

2009-05-05T14:38:00.000-07:00

OMG! Seriously first our day started off by me being out of bed before 10 AM which is unheard of for a Saturday. Then we went and helped move a house for four hours then we all went over to Lexie and Todd’s for a BBQ. We were having a great time drinking and sitting in the sun. Well my Cabana Boy got really drunk really fast like in a two hour span of time and passed out on the couch and then woke up two hours later needing to pee. He then proceeded to go down stairs (we assume that he was trying to get outside) but before he could make it he let lose in the hallway. Needless to say since I invited him I was upset and of course blamed myself. Everything worked out alright in the end but Cabana Boy is grounded for the time being. Not that he ready to face anyone at this moment he couldn’t even look at me directly. Can’t says I blame him that would be so embarrassing. However if this had been me that this happened too I think the first thing that would have went through Alexis’s mind is “Awesome ammo for the rest of her life” it just goes to show you that your true friends will always love you no matter what. Besides they could never get rid of me I’m way too cute.

Friday

2009-05-05T12:37:00.000-07:00

OK so I actually did it I went home and did some gardening. I got some new soil and planted seeds (Although I really think the seed companies totally jip you in the amount of the seeds that come in each pack) I mean really do they come with a money back guarantee that if they don’t bloom you can call them up and they will replace the seeds or at least refund your money. Sorry I digress. Anyway so right now I have a pretty little patch of fresh dirt. I’m so excited but I am keeping my hopes low about them actually blooming because I have a bad history with plants in the past.

It's a B-E-A-U-tiful DAY!

2009-05-01T17:01:00.000-07:00

OK so here is the plan for today. Get off work then go to Home Depot and get some gardening stuff and do some gardening. Yeah that’s right and those of you that know me – know that for me to “Get Dirty” is the first sign of the apocalypse – so hopefully I will make it through this with out anything ICKY happening but I have to get out in the sun because it’s driving me crazy and I have ants in my pants with the thought of sitting here waiting to be out in it.

Seriously I hope the rest of the summer is a good as today.

This Weekend

2009-03-12T17:21:00.001-07:00

So this weekend I have plans to go out to the valley and party with Kelly and Travis. We plan on drinking and hanging out on Saturday night. But Kelly has threatened me with physical activity on Sunday. She says we are going sledding. I asked her if this meant that she would be driving me to the top of the hill and then I can sled down and then she can drive me back up again because that sounds like fun. But alas she says I will have to walk up the hill to sled back down. So I ask you “Does that even remotely sound like something I would find fun?” Well we will see what happens.

Episode – WHATEVER! I Can’t Keep Track Of The Roman Numerals Anymore.

2009-03-10T16:25:00.000-07:00

Seriously though it’s been forever since I posted a blog. I’ve been busy and well frankly haven’t felt like posting anything. But I am going to try this again.

So last week I was taking my trash out and was stopped at the curb by a guy that lives down the street from me. I didn’t recognize him but he said his name was Andre (and what a fine looking black man he is). Anyway the following is the conversation that followed:

Andre: “Hi”
Me: “Hi” – a little nervously because I have never met this neighbor before.
Andre: “You don’t remember me do you?”
Me: “I’m sorry you look familiar but I can’t say that I do.”
Andre: “Awhile back (and he meant almost a year ago) you were coming home from the bar and you took a cab home but the cab driver dropped you off at my house and I told him you didn’t live there but that I knew where you lived and that I would take you home because I didn’t trust the cab guy he was kind of shady.”

At this point I am beginning to think this guy is mental because I have never been dropped off at the wrong house.

Me: “I don’t remember that are you sure it was me?”
Andre: “yeah you were wearing a jean mini skirt and I walked you home and even used your keys to unlock the door and as soon as I did you fell into the house on the living room floor and there is where you stayed I felt bad about leaving you but you were home and appeared to be safe so I left.”

Imagine my chagrin when I realize the last time I wore that skirt was the very first night in my life I have ever blacked out. I’m pretty sure I turned beet red.

Me: “Oh yeah I remember NOT remember that night, well thanks for saving me from the creepy cabby.”
Andre: “no problem I just thought I would introduce myself and tell you I’m Andre.”
Me: “Nice to meet you, next time I have a BBQ I will be sure to invite you and introduce you to all my friends as Andre the guy that saved me.”

At this point he drove down the street to his house (which I can see from my living room window but honestly the cabby had been way off). So I go rushing back into the house to call Alexis and tell her that you know it was a bad night when strangers still remember what happened to you and you don’t.

On a side note I love my neighbors they are awesome to me!

Episode CXIII: “Drunk Phone Calls”

2008-07-17T17:55:00.000-07:00

Now I do this – most of you have been victims of this before. However last night at 3AM my cell phone rings and I look it’s not a number I recognize so I say screw it and go back to sleep. Then it rings again at 4 AM and I decide to answer and give whoever it is a piece of my mind. This is how the conversation goes:

Me: “Hello”
Caller: “Hey you want to smoke a blunt?”
Me: “What? Who is this?”
Caller: “It’s James” – (This is not the James most of you are thinking of he knows better this is James #2)
Me: “James who?”
Caller: “James M. I met you at the bar”
Me: “Are you sure? Who are you trying to reach?”
Caller: “Keri”
Me: “That’s me and you say I know you and gave you my number?”
Caller: “Yes – I remember because it’s Keri with a K”
At this point I’m like shit that is what I say – damn it I do know this guy and I am starting to remember who he is the problem is I removed his number from my phone because I hadn’t heard from him in almost a year. Who randomly calls up someone they haven’t talked to in almost a year at 4AM in the morning on a week day and asks them if they want to smoke a blunt? I haven’t done that since I can’t remember when and certainly not with this guy. Back to the conversation:
Me: “OK I think I know who you are now. However about your request – I’ll pass but thanks for offering”
Caller: “OK I will let you go then”
Me: “Yeah Kay Good Night”

I mean really I guess it serves me right for answering the phone but curiosity got the better of me. Oh well.

Episode CXII: “Melody Called Me A SADIST”

2008-07-16T17:28:00.000-07:00

Which is not “ENTIRELY” true. But I have once again been elevated to the top of her stab list. Apparently she has never WAXED she is a pluck and shave kind of girl. So one night we got into a conversation about the benefits of waxing and she agreed to try it out. Now that I think back on it I should have sent her to a professional first, it being her first time and everything – it always hurts more when you do it yourself because you know when your going to pull therefore you know when the pain is coming. Well hind sight is 20/20. Anyway she did stick with it and didn’t chicken out but half way through she did have to drink a little courage to finish. Now how we managed to get wax all over the bathroom floor I am not rightly sure but it is worse then a bar bathroom and you almost feel like you want to wear shower shoes to walk in there. Here’s to a hair free world.

Episode CXI: “Tampa Bay “Rays” – are WHAT!”

2008-07-02T17:48:00.000-07:00

So apparently the “Rays” are currently number one in the nation. Does that seem right to anyone? I mean having spent a good portion of my childhood in Tampa I feel a connection for the place. I also supported the “Bucs” while I was down there and even after I left and they finally won the SuperBowl a week after I moved up here to Alaska. So once that was done I changed my allegiance to the next underdog the Seattle Seahawks they came close to winning the SuperBowl but were robbed!

So now with the Rays in the running – I have no choice but to root for them considering that Tampa Bay and Seattle are the only other two places I have been for longer then I have been in Alaska.

Episode CX: “Road Rash!”

2008-05-05T17:16:00.000-07:00

Friday – found me at 5:40pm taking shots in my kitchen and making a drink. I had every intention of staying home and just vegging. So me and Kelly are sitting on the couch drinking then around eight I run out of smokes so we come up with the plan that Kelly will ride her bicycle and I will sit on the handlebars and we will go up to the gas station. The entire trip through the neighborhood was hysterical and both of could not keep from laughing but we made it to the main road and decided it was safer to walk then ride next tot the cars. So on the way back when we get into the neighborhood we try to repeat ourselves the problem is neither one of us can stop laughing long enough to maintain our balance. Shoot Kelly can’t even hold herself and the bike up. So after several attempts and near death experiences she decides to walk while I ride. Then we meet up with two guys on mini motor bikes and she catches a ride with one of them. Once we get back to the house the other guy is determined to get me on his bike so I agree to go for a quick ride. It was fun then we get back to the house because I have no intention of actually hanging out with these guys when it’s clear they just want a booty call. Well Kelly goes back out for a ride and apparently ends up crashing and come home with an injury on her hand so even she gives up but the guys continue to buzz the house and knock on the door trying to get us to come out and play. Well ten o’clock finds both of us passed out on the couch.

Now Road Rash is what I text when I am completely wasted – which is what happened on Saturday.

“S” came over around nine and we took some shots and had a drink and Kelly drove us to the bar at ten. I proceeded to get my drink on had fun (wore jeans instead of a mini skirt). I am 98% sure it was Dimond who gave me a ride home sometime around 2:30 announced to Kelly when I got home that I was drunk apparently sent out a drunk text which I have no record of on my phone and don’t remember sending. Sunday found me trying to sleep it off. Got out of the house Sunday night to go clean and then came home and went to bed.

So that’s about it for my weekend – how was everyone else’s?

My First Name Ain't BABY

2008-05-02T16:50:00.000-07:00

It's Keri,

Jones if your nasty!

Nasty boys don't mean a thing - oh you nasty boys!

Episode CIX: “Tempting Fate!”

2008-05-02T13:18:00.000-07:00

So I decided to tempt fate again by wearing my fabulous pink Coach sandals to work today. It’s a little chilly but if it snows I am going to be really upset.

I’m sitting here at my desk wondering if it’s possible to get frost bite at 65% because I am freezing. My toes and fingers are about to go on strike so I actually just went out to the car to get my coat (even though I was already wearing layers a shirt and jacket type thing) and I am sitting cross legged in my chair with a throw blanket over my lap.

I am bored with work and e-mailing my friends. There is talk about a possible David Hasslehoff theme party coming up – I have decided that I will go with the Baywatch David look of a pair of short red shorts and some how purchase a red personal floatation device to strategically place over my ya-ya’s I hope it’s warm that day. Then Tammy says we might actually have to go to a bar dressed that way – to which I replied that I would need massive amounts of alcohol and a escort for security purposes and that I might need to bring an entourage (apparently according to Kurt I have one – who knew) all this because I am a Diva.

Then of course there would be Knight Rider David – what’s that a pair of jeans and a t-shirt with a beat-up black leather coat. How would I sex that up? Maybe by tearing the t-shirt into a mid-drift, naw too boring.

Maybe I should just dress up as a rock star and sing “hooked on a feeling” like David did in 1997. That was the year I graduated from high school. That might work – hmmm – maybe guess we will have to just wait and see.

Episode CVIII: “Since I am Feeling Unloved by My Friends”

2008-04-28T17:29:00.000-07:00

I am posting another blog.

This one is about a conversation I had the other day with my neighbor from across the street. It was after work last week and I was at home watching TV and it was about that time when the sun comes shining in through the window in my front door and right into my eyes – I hate this especially when I am trying to watch TV I keep my house so dark my friends call it the cave – that’s right I have my own Bat Cave (I know you all are jealous). Anyway so I stepped outside to do the ghetto fabulous thing of hanging a towel over the door to block the window and my neighbor was outside and flat out asked me what I was doing. I explained my reasons. To which he replied “Oh – I thought it was something else” at which point he proceeds to tell me that back in his college days hanging something on your front door was a sign to your roommate that you were occupied and they were not to come in.” To which I replied “I don’t give my roommates warnings like that let them walk in on something I dare them! Besides if I were to do something like that I would simply post a huge ass sign on the door saying “I’M GETTING LAID – STAY OUT!” I mean really why try to be coy about it. On a side note if he thought that is really what it meant then how rude of him to stop and chat me up when I might possibly be about to get some – HOW RUDE.

Still it did get me wondering what the other neighbors thought it meant.

Episode CVII: “Death to the Weatherman!”

2008-04-28T16:25:00.000-07:00

Friday, April 25, 2008

OK so Wednesday the temperature was down right warm at least for us Alaskans. Thursday it was a little chillier but still a relatively nice day I even wore peek-a-boo sandal type shoes. Then this morning it was suppose to rain today but I decided to wear a single strap pair of sandals today on the way to work there were a couple of flurries mixed in with the rain – OK I though well that sucks but not to bad. By ten this morning it was all out snowing and by lunch time I was out brushing my car off in an inch of snow while my piggy toes protested violently. Now at three this afternoon there is about 4 inches on the ground and slightly more on the cars and it shows no signs of stopping. I might even leave 30 mins early from work today. It’s the bloody end of April people this is ridiculous I should sue!

Saturday, April 26, 2008

UPDATE! It snowed a total of 18 inches yesterday that’s was just in one day. This morning the world is white and the dog disappeared off the back porch into a snow bank. It was deep enough to lose Yoda (a pug) but you could see where he had been by the movement of the trench. Kelly thinking this was funny decided the cat really needed to experience it as well and the next thing there is a black blur of cat flying out the back door into the snow and then the cat propelled himself back into the house in a matter of seconds.

Monday, April 28, 2008

2ND UPDATE! Well over the last couple of days most of the snow has melted off, there is only about two inches hanging around on the ground but the roads are clear. Weatherman expects all snow to have melted off by weekend – I might even get back into my sandals by the end of the week.

Thursday picture everything brown and no snow really to be seen except in shady areas and then this picture below was taken on Saturday. INSANE!

Episode CVI: “I am still alive.”

2008-04-23T13:44:00.000-07:00

Well yes I am still functioning I have been really busy with the new business and of course my weekend shenanigans. Not to mention busy with my regular job as well. Last Friday I embarrassed myself with an emotional display at the bar – but I’m over it now and hoping no one will remember.

Current Residence of my house is as follows. ME – Kelly and Melody and Mikey will be back sometime this weekend. I have good intentions of cleaning my house thoroughly this week since I clean everyone else’s it’s time I looked toward the home front. I mean clean too like spring cleaning so much so I don’t think there will be any partying this weekend and if I do end up going out it will be an alcohol free weekend. My body needs a break apparently. I am experiencing a pain in my back right side – I have come to the conclusion that it is not my back but maybe something to do with my Kidney (like a stone – that would suck) or better yet I could be getting shingles again that was fun last time. So pretty much to much stress in my life right now. All is relatively good though. I promise to get back on the blogging horse this next month.

Episode CV: “Alcohol, Mini Skirt and Pasties”

2008-03-31T11:23:00.000-07:00

WooHoo – What a night I had on Saturday. Big Thangs happening. The evening ended with me face down on my living room floor. It started with me up right and drinking at 7:00 pm then we headed to the Big Show at Kootz and then Jessy and Kelly bailed out around 11:00 and then I ran into Staci and John and Tammy and Joe, apparently there was some cage dancing and a private escort for me to the cab I remember a brief nap on my front porch before I made it into the house. I also remember a message to Jessy’s phone with me saying “Ouch! Ouch!” like the way they do in the movie ET. I didn’t move off the couch all day on Sunday as a matter of fact I didn’t make it up the stairs until I was ready to go to bed last night at 10:30. Bunches of fun!

Episode CIV: “Getting too old for this Shit”

2008-03-18T10:57:00.000-07:00

OK so Friday night I went out to celebrate Staci’s birthday we started at Asian Gardens and then headed to Kootz around 11:00. Staci was done by 12:30 so I went home then too. Saturday night was Shelle’s birthday and we started at the house and then went to Kootz. She turned 40 and I am the one suffering. Saturday she bailed I don’t know when but I was literally the last customer out of Kootz. Then I called up Jessy and met her downtown and hung out playing games then we ended up at my house for a bit and I didn’t get to bed until 7:30 Sunday morning. I got about 6 hours of sleep then got up to go get my car from Lexie’s then crashed on her couch for a few hours. Then went home and vegged for a few hours then went to bed. Woke up and came to work on Monday and I feel like I have been run over – I have shin splints (in both legs) which is probably from being on me feet in my hoe boots for 12 hours I think I sprained my left ankle and gave myself a hernia from coughing. Last night my ankle and my legs hurt so bad I slept like crap so now I am tired on top of everything else. I think I will go to bed early tonight, I need to rest up who know what is planned for this next weekend.

Episode CIII: “Super Secret Project”

2008-03-13T12:33:00.000-07:00

OK so let’s just say me and a friend were talking about old fashion photos of the sexy possibly nude verity and how we would love some done tastefully and classic not perverted. So with this in mind we decided to get together and play dress up and take some sexy pictures. I wanted to do this now while my body is looking the best it has in 5 years and before it starts to go down hill again.

Now here are a couple of the pictures obviously there are tons of other ones but most need to have the background cropped out and maybe some red eye touch up. But you guys will get the point. Now considering I am wearing more in these photos then I do with my bathing suit there should be no problem.

Episode CII: “Missing In Action”

2008-03-12T13:31:00.000-07:00

So yesterday Lexie was totally missing in action – I finally heard from her today apparently she was out at some village so I guess I will let it slide.

It freaking snowed last night – can we say RUDE! I was getting so excited it looked like I might be able to bust out with my sandals soon – no such luck I guess. That’s alright since after this weekend I think I am going to completely drop off the face of the earth for awhile at least in my public appearances I will still try and post regularly on here.

The super top secret project might be coming to an end this week if so I will let you know how it went.

Episode CI: “Well I Have Turned Into A Girl”

2008-03-11T14:15:00.001-07:00

That’s right the girl who wants to know why, or what does that mean or tell me how your feeling. I now have this uncontrollable urge to want to know the meaning behind everything. However do not fear or get your hopes up depending on who you are. I still am me – with that great ability to rationalize from a guys point of view much to the dismay of some of my friends. I do however feel like a three year stuck in that WHY phase, this is all new territory for me so walking cautiously in the slight forward side step motion checking for emotional land mines.

P.S.Went out on Saturday and nearly put myself into a coma. I actually drank so much I have memory loss and can’t remember half the night – I vaguely remember trying to walk home from the Bush Company because it really is not that far and the weather was actually great and felt sort of warm (well warm for this time of year). Then I remember Jessy telling me that I couldn’t walk home because I would ruin my new shoes – suddenly I have a flash back to the scene from Legally Blonde where that same line is used. It apparently did work even though I am not blonde anymore I still have my vain moments. Also I remember telling Joe (my bartender) to make me a shot and when he asked me what I wanted I replied defiantly that I wanted him to MAKE IT HURT (I was having a bad weekend). Opps – My bad a SNAKE BITE not good, my mistake – I should have known better then to utter these words to Joe. Unfortunately the drinking didn’t stop after that thanks to Kelly I was able to pretty much keep a drink in my hand all night. Our stay at the Bush Company was short but I was so out of it I don’t remember seeing one naked chick at all – It’s a strip club people – how is this possible. So come Sunday morning (afternoon, whatever!) hearing Jessy and Kelly talking about what happened I kept saying where the hell was I for that at which point they would inform me that I was right there and then sadly shake their heads. So yeah – can’t let that happen again EVER!

Episode C: “Holy Canolly!”

2008-02-25T14:52:00.000-08:00

It has been almost an entire month since I posted anything – nothing to exciting has been happening – there were moments here and there but I have been so busy with the change over at work that I haven’t posted JACK! So here on my 100th post I decided to let you all know that am in fact not dead and I am doing pretty well.

This last weekend I once again attempted to color my hair and could not get the right color I wanted so after 4 boxes of hair color and a tingly sensation of the scalp that still has not gone away I am now a lightish brown color with hints still of the orange red that I was trying to get rid of. One day I will have the money to go in and get my hair done again. I look forward to that day.

I have big plans for next weekend but it is a secret project in the works and I can’t tell you about – but if all turns out OK I will be able to post the outcome at a later date I will keep you informed. I have a busy week planned.
Tonight I have to go over to Lexie’s house so she can put the pink highlights in my hair my sort of gift to my boss who loves to tease me about my hair I decided since he is leaving I will make sure my hair is something he can remember me by.
Tuesday – My boss and his wife going away party is tomorrow so I get to hang out with the people from work.
Wednesday – I am doing a happy hour special get together with Staci and Tammy after work.
Thursday – it is Jessy’s birthday and we will be heading to Kootz I do have to work on Friday so I am thinking that it won’t be a late night but if it is well it is her birthday and we all know I can function on only a couple hours of sleep so that’s good.

So far that is all I have planned. If anything absolutely exciting happens then I will be sure to inform you all. Much love.

Episode LXXXXIX: “What A Busy Week!”

2008-01-29T15:32:00.000-08:00

OK so I know I haven’t posted anything in a whole week. Things have been crazy at home and at work. I had to hire two new helpers at work and then complete their safety training and then yesterday the new boss’s started so that is all new and hectic. My house is chaos Melissa flies home tonight to go back to Seattle since the moving up here thing didn’t work out the way we had planned – we weren’t expecting the dry spell in the job market. I had one of the helpers from work on my couch for the last four days she left to fly to Ketchikan this morning, I might have the house to myself for a whole day and then Jessy will be staying there with me for a bit while she finds other arrangements. But hey at least my life is not boring even if it’s not all out to the wee hours of the morning partying anymore. More to come once I figure everything out.

Episode LXXXXVIII: “What’s Up Peeps!”

2008-01-22T11:55:00.000-08:00

So this weekend was pretty dull for me. Melissa went out to the beer and barely festival got completely wasted and did not end up going to bed until 11:30 Saturday afternoon she was hanging out with Dallas and Brandon. She got two hours of sleep and then was up again. I vegged most of the weekend I did get up and dressed on Saturday night to go over to hang out with them at Dallas’s house. I got there at about 10 at night and even though I wasn’t drinking or anything I was asleep on his couch by 11:30 I woke up at and we left at 2 am Sunday. Went home and then got up at 10:30 ran some errands and then Jessy came over and we were going to cook dinner and watch the Packer/Giants game – GO GIANTS! Then I got a cryptic phone call from Sam (my old roommate) wanting to know what I was doing for the next hour I said laundry and watching TV. He told me he would be at the house in 3 minutes and I was to get in the car. That was weird but I was ready and waiting when he pulled up. I sped the ten minute car ride in a little bit of fear because he wouldn’t tell me where we were going and asked if I didn’t trust him. I told him I did trust him – “to launch me out of a trebuchet”. Well it turns out he was bored and just wanted someone to play putt putt golf with so we played a game and actually ended up tying it up BUT I DID GET A HOLE IN ONE – GRANDPA WOULD BE SO PROUD! So I got another point Sam = 24, Keri = 526. Anyway we went back to the house and the four of us (Melissa, Sam, Jessy and I) watched the rest of the football game I was the only one rooting for the Giants which made it even more fun when they won.

Last night I dressed up Yoda (see picture below)!

Super bowl – Giant vs. Patriots (I will be rooting for the Patriots but they have won the super bowl before so I won’t mind if the Giants win I think I will end up rooting for whoever everyone else is rooting against). Its way more fun that way!

Episode LXXXXVII: “I Had A Bad Moment Last Night”

2008-01-18T09:29:00.000-08:00

So my day and night were actually pretty good yesterday. Until I decided I needed to clean out my closet and pack away the clothes I can’t wear right now. As I tried things on some of the clothes I can wear again are almost ten years old. That is not the depressing part though the problem is most of the clothes that were tight on me are now almost a bit baggy and we all know I like to wear jeans and pants that I need a pair of pliers to pull the zipper up with to pour myself into to them. Not so much now because I have NO ASS! What little that is there is a bit saggy and in most of my nice pants when you look at me from behind I look like a board - straight down. This is no longer funny and an intervention is in order. I don’t care what the norm is I would rather gain thirty pounds and have my curves back then be skinny. I am seriously remembering some horrible times from high school when I had no boobs but I still at least had a butt – now I have neither. So I will start my lunges this evening I think if I do a thousand of them a day that should help perk up the butt I have and I plan on eating only pasta as soon as I have money again to go shopping.

I just weighed myself and I am now at 169 and that is fully clothed. My goal is to get back up to 190.

Episode LXXXXVI: “I Figured It Out.”

2008-01-15T14:45:00.000-08:00

Rainbow bright here – checking in.

So I have done a lot of thinking the last couple of days. This is what I have come up with:

So I have always been the good child relatively easy to raise I can fit into almost any situation and feel comfortable. This I totally thank my mother for and the fact that I was a military brat. I’m use to moving and having to adapt. I can usually fit into any group of people weather it be a black tie event or standing in the middle of the ghetto. I look at people as if they are just that people not a group. Over all I have usually always had my shit together.

Then Grandpa passed away (I am not using this as an excuse) but it sort of threw me for a loop. I was already starting to have financial difficulties at this time and so when the doctor introduced me to my Happy Pills – all hell broke loose. That’s right I felt fabulous and had tons of energy. Downside: I didn’t give a shit about anything.

That’s right folks for the last half of the year I have been rebelling. I never got my rebel stage (I think I was gypped in this because it’s better to go through this stage when you’re younger and it’s easier to rebound when you’re in your early twenties as opposed to say your late twenties). So alas no more Happy Pills means I am not dealing with change in my life as easily as I would have say 6 months ago. Now when I get a shut off notice for one of my many overdue bills I no longer shout into the night “Bite ME electric company I will pay you when I feel like it as long as my mortgage is paid I will live in my house freezing and in the dark and you still won’t take me, WaaHaHa!”

Now it’s more like I open the bill and then curl up into a little ball and start crying. I will make it, it will be tough for the next few months but I am confident that I can make it back to the place where I have my shit together and people can rely on me once again.

So I would like to apologize right now to my family first for being a complete idiot and to the friends I have lost touch with in my quest to be the party girl and just have a little fun. The shark that is life has just swam up from the depths of my soul where the old Keri resides still, broken but not beat down to the point of no return – yeah that shark has just bitten me in the ass.

However the upside of the Happy Pills is that I am not afraid to show emotion and I know if I break down and cry it will all be OK because my friends and family will still love me.

Episode LXXXXV: “EXTRA, EXTRA – Read All About It!”

2008-01-11T09:37:00.000-08:00

“Rainbow Bright Brained In Horrific Shower Trauma”

OK so my hair had turned out to light so I wanted to make it go darker so Melissa bought me more hair color. It is a color I have used before I just couldn’t remember when. So we went home and she put it on my head and I waited then went to take a shower. As I was rinsing my hair my shower nozzle attacked me nearly knocking me out. Then I get out and dry my hair so I can see it – let’s put it this way even wet I could see the red. OK so not really the dark brown color I was going for I dry it and go down stairs to tell Melissa that I am officially Rainbow Bright. She says it looks more like Mahogany which she is probably right but I did not want this much red in my hair. So once I get some money again I am going to go back and try and find a dark brown.

I actually like this color but I am not sure that I am in the mood for this color at this time. I don’t know I might get use to it – maybe I will take a census.

Episode LXXXXIV: “The Cat Broke The Bank”

2008-01-10T12:38:00.000-08:00

Seriously this is not like last time when the cat “Puddy” went outside and failed miserably at being a cat and came back home after gouging a nice tear in his stomach which required a emergency visit to the vet and 14 stitches costing me $450 to fix him up right again. (He was grounded to the house for almost two years after that little incident). However this is not a metaphor – he literally knocked my glass piggy bank off the table and on to the floor. So he quite literally Broke the Bank. He does not like being locked in the house but he’s not man enough to want to spend too much time outside in the cold. He is driving everyone crazy humans and dogs alike. He also has this thing with dragging my bras out of my dressing room and downstairs and then leaving them lying in the front room. I won’t tell you how many time I have come home with friends to find my lingerie right there for the world to see. It wouldn’t be so bad if I had hastily removed it or had it removed and it got deposited there because at least that would be fun. So in conclusion “FREE CAT TO GOOD HOME!”

Also since I was fond of that Piggy Bank – having decorated it myself a year ago when I was in Hawaii with Lexie and her parents. I might need to call upon Lexie’s mother for a new one. DAMN CAT!

Episode LXXXXIII: “Fantastic! – NOT!”

2008-01-09T16:02:00.000-08:00

OK so this is what has happen since I last posted on my birthday.

Thursday night: Melissa was my designated driver took some shots before leaving the house. Got to Kootz at about 8:00, got a BLT and saw some of the Big Show. Lance and Celeste showed up it was their anniversary so Lance proceeded to buy me drinks. Big Mike made me do a Blow Job shot off one of the Big Show regulars. I didn’t win the chance to spin but we hung out for a bit longer and went home at 11:30 and made it to bed by 1:00 am.

Friday: we ran some errands and got ready for the big night out. 7:30 found me inebriated at the hockey game – so much so that I actually threw a note over the glass to Cody Rudkowsky and Scott Kelman who were playing for the other team. No it did not contain my phone number. But it was funny. Then after the game we went to Platinum Jaxx and met up with Tammy, Heather, Tool and Kurt (they then disappeared off the face of the earth when Marcella, Melissa and I moved to Kootz at midnight. Dallas and his friend Brandon showed up later and we all hung out. At this point I wasn’t feeling well. NO it was not from the drinking so at 1:30 I told Melissa I wanted to go home. I went home and crawled into bed woke up late on Saturday morning and proceeded to suffer from the Black Plague as did Melissa.

Saturday: I think I might have gone downstairs and left my bed only long enough to take the dogs out.

Sunday: Replay of Saturday – I was becoming one with my bed and suffering a backache on top of everything else from being in bed so long.

Monday: Left the house for a total of an hour and a half to run to the doctor and the bank. But at least when I made it home I stayed downstairs curled up on the couch I sort of needed a change of scenery. Started to feel a little more human Monday night went to bed with every intention of going to work the next day.

Tuesday: Woke up to go to work was dizzy and aching all over and Hello Welcome back fever. Called in to work it just wasn’t happening but set up the blow up mattress right in the middle of the living room continued to sleep and watch TV went up stairs to bed that night and woke up this morning feeling better but still not great. Right now I just want to go home and go to bed.

So over all not my best birthday weekend ever. But hey at least I am another year older and wiser right!

Also I was able to color my hair and it is a light brown now so I am going to have to color it again to get to the dark brown I want. I think my blonde party days are over at least for now I am so broke I can’t afford it anyways plus it is winter time and I really crave nothing else but to relax and over all do nothing.

BUTT JEANS!!!

2008-01-03T14:23:00.000-08:00

Butt Jeans - Butt Jeans - Butt Jeans! I got my butt jeans in the mail today! SWEET!

Episode LXXXXII: “Happy Birthday to ME!”

2008-01-03T09:52:00.000-08:00

Good morning everyone – today is a fabulous day I am completely off my meds and feeling great. I just had a piece of chocolate cake for breakfast and I will be having posole for lunch all thanks to my wonderful co-workers. Lexie was the first to call me this morning it was a bit early but still, then Jaime called and then April sent me a text and John and Grandma Duffany sent an e-mail. So I am feeling really loved already and I have only actually been up for an hour. I am hoping to also get Monday off so I might not be blogging until next Tuesday. Much love to all.

Episode LXXXXI: “2008!”

2008-01-02T15:56:00.001-08:00

Well it is the start of a brand new year. My New Years Eve night consisted of me getting drunk by 8:30 and getting to Kootz by 9:30 and running around the bar some dancing and more drinking a couple of drunk phone calls to those that I love. My mother and my sister – they pretty much think I am whacked but so are they so they would never judge. Then we left the bar at 1:30 and a few people came back to the house. I vaguely remember passing out around 5:30 on the couch and then moving upstairs to my bed falling asleep to Harry Potter. Then being rudely awakened less then four hours later to deal with a busted pipe on a water heater at I house I sort of sudo manage. Spent three and a half hours over there dealing with plumbers and people removing water. Got home and back in bed by 2:30 in the afternoon got about 3 hours of sleep before Lexie started to call and bug me because she was out having her party and so I got up to meet her at the Bush Company and then proceeded back to my house where Lexie and her accomplice toilet papered Dave’s car (sort of serves him right for leaving it unlocked). Then I couldn’t get to sleep until 1:30 this morning. I am so tired and I have a lot to do tonight but I will be in bed early because tomorrow is my birthday and I plan on starting it with a bang tomorrow night since I have off on Friday. I am also thinking about taking off on Monday so I can have one more day to do absolutely nothing because that is what I want to do.

Friday nights plan includes a hockey game, Platinum Jaxx and then Kootz. I have bullied most people into either going out with me on Thursday night or Friday. So it should be fun.

Episode LXXXX: “I AM STILL ALIVE!”

2007-12-31T12:07:00.000-08:00

Sorry folks. Christmas was good and I have been mostly vegging. However Melissa got up here last Friday night and Jessy and her son came over and we proceeded to get drunk at my house. I even put on a little show of counter dancing in my kitchen and I even got to sleep with a little man. Jessy’s son is so adorable he went over to his father’s on Saturday and so did not want to leave he liked hanging out with us girls and having us all dote on him. Then Saturday was a low key night and we all got to bed relatively early at least for us. Then yesterday we proceeded to eat non stop for like 5 hours and painted toes and nails in preparation for tonight. I went to bed early because I actually am at work today. I have tomorrow off though and tonight Melissa is going to be the designated driver. So that is awesome I don’t have to pay for a cab since I can’t afford one anyway. Jessy is still at the house and has been there since Friday night which is great and I am pretty sure she is going out with us tonight “S” is also going out with us tonight and I believe Melody is too. Should be a good night I will try and get a lot of pictures since I haven’t taken any recently. Also my birthday is coming up on Thursday and we are mostly going to celebrate on Friday night but since I have Friday off I might get a jump start on Thursday. Who knows then after that it will be back to just hanging out around the house doing a whole lot of nothing. Hope everyone has a good and safe holiday. Love you all.

Episode LXXXIX: “I CHEATED!”

2007-12-21T15:23:00.000-08:00

OK so I got a present from my dad Donald. It was an envelope and it specifically said do not open until Christmas well I assumed it was going to be cash because that is usually what we get so needing the money stat I opened it anyway not cash but a gift card to Victoria Secrets. I screamed “BUTT JEANS!” Now I have been wanting to get some more since my other ones became to large so this is awesome instead of being responsible I have no choice but to buy clothes. Then I had to call my mother and confess because I can’t keep a secret from my mother. Then she said I had a gift card for the same thing coming from Grandpa Bilger (which is awesome). Then she said something that is so true and I quote “You know when it comes to butts and butt jeans the men in this family are all about helping out.” So here is to the fabulous men in my family I will take a picture of my butt in the butt jeans so you can post it on your wall.

PS – Today I received an e-mail from Victoria Secrets that they are having their semi-annual sale so even better. Hope to have my new butt jeans here by New Years.

Episode LXXXVIII: “Completely Sober and In My Right State of Mind.”

2007-12-20T12:15:00.000-08:00

HORNY!

Have you ever been so horny that even your underwear makes things worse and you can’t even think about going with out especially with jeans cause that would be even more unbearable? It’s to the point that thinking of something or someone turns you on and yet you are almost to the point of finding some random person to assist with your problem even if you know it wouldn’t be truly satisfying. This was me last night I went home and completely undressed and laid on the bed with no covers nothing touching me because I was super sensitive. Yeah so doing better today but for crying out loud that sucks.

Episode LXXXVII: “7.2 on the Richter Scale!”

2007-12-19T09:59:00.000-08:00

So apparently at 11:30 pm last night we had an earthquake out on the Aleutian Chain about 125 west of Adak. Now Adak was my home for two years when I was younger and I have a great fondness for that island. No one was hurt and there was no damage. I didn’t feel a thing as I was asleep but I probably wouldn’t of felt it anyway if I was awake since that is about a thousand miles a way – apparently there was a good size wave that hit somewhere in no where Alaska. Whatever – on to other things.

So the following is a list of stupid things I have done recently:

So I tweaked my back out trying to load myself up with everything that needed to go upstairs because I was too lazy to come back down the stairs and make a second trip.

I spent 20 minutes looking through my bed for the remote that I knew for sure was lost somewhere in the covers and then finally gave up after pissing off the dogs to find the remote on the floor by my bed. Who would have thought to look there?

I totally forgot about my advent calendar until last night and then I started opening up everything and until I was done with only 6 days left unopened I realized I started at the wrong number and completely did it backwards – do these things come with directions (even if it did do you think I stopped to read them).

I have been experiencing major issues with my cell phones. I loose them or forget them or they spend some quality time in the snow. This has happened a lot over the last couple weeks I was complaining to Lexie about it and she politely told me this might mean I am partying too much. DAMN! Lexie just said I party too much. Well I guess that’s true so alas I am cutting back I will be out for New Years and I will be out the following weekend to celebrate my birthday. Then we will see what happens.

PS – I made Kool-Aid last night – haven’t had that in forever!

Episode LXXXVI: “So Long Happy Pills.”

2007-12-18T10:35:00.000-08:00

OK so most of you know me well enough to know that I hate taking pills especially ones I have to take daily. Even my Thyroid ones I forget half the time and if I have a headache I am more likely to take a nap then a pain killer. So I just had an appointment with my shrink and we are both in agreement that I don’t need to be on them anymore so we have started a decrease program to get me off of them. So in one months time I will be back to the old Keri although I have learned that it’s OK for me to have a breakdown or be emotional so for those of you that are worried I am going to stop being the crazy Keri have no fear I have never been completely normal EVER – this is hereditary and there is nothing I can do about that the whole family is whacked! Hopefully though this will allow me be less fidgety and to where I can sit down and watch a whole movie again. I miss vegging in front of the TV and it is my personal feeling that this is why I have started my hibernation phase late I should be one month into a coma but alas I am still all over the place. If I don’t get my sleepy time then I get sick and I will never make it through next summer in one piece.

Episode LXXXV: “Full Moon!”

2007-12-17T14:52:00.000-08:00

OK last weekend. I started feeling under the weather on Friday night so I went to bed early (at ten) and was awake by 8:30 on Saturday I proceeded to sleep most of the day Saturday and then got ready and went to Tammy’s birthday party at 8:00 then I swung by Jessy and Gabe’s for a bit and then I was going to surprises Joe but when I drove by the house at 10:20 all the lights were out and I’m pretty sure he was sleeping. So I went home to take a couple shots and wait for Tammy to call and tell me when they were moving to Kootz. So in a cab on my way to Kootz about midnight hung out there until just before the bar closed and then Kurt and I went back over to Jessy & Gabe’s and hung out there for awhile (they once again kicked my butt at cards – am getting use to it). Got home around 6:00 am and went to bed. I think I must have eaten about 4 burritos that night I was starving. Slept literally all day on Sunday so I am feeling better not so under the weather but I still think I have a cold coming on.

Also the full moon this month is on Monday Christmas Eve which means I have one week to get my stuff together and sent down to a friend – we are trying an experiment and if it works I will be selling my services for your first born child. It will so be worth it.

P.S. Tool stop critiquing my spelling or I will beat you over the head with a shovel. <- A false disclaimer is nobody’s friend!

Episode LXXXIV: “Can I get a pair of horse blinders please?”

2007-12-14T15:40:00.000-08:00

So as I sit here at my desk with my left hand up to my face to block my sight of the left half of my desk. I feel happy and lighter because I have finally finished all the work that was on the right side of my desk. I need to get completely caught up because in a few months I am either going to start my plans for my hostel take over of my company or I am at least going to have everything done if I need to run screaming from the building so that I won’t have a guilt complex. BIG PLANS! But they are secret plans right now but my mind is taking over.

I have also entered my hibernator stage of the winter I am sleeping a lot or just vegging so there won’t be many partying blogs although Tammy’s birthday party is on Saturday so I will be going to that but I don’t know as of yet if I will be staying out late.

Episode LXXXIII: “Extremely Busy Weekend”

2007-12-10T11:59:00.001-08:00

OK so as you know we had our Christmas Party on Friday night. The food was so awesome and I even went back for seconds. Then a few of us went over to Jaxx to hang out but since I had a late night on Thursday I was tired and wasn’t feeling it. So I was at home and in bed by 11:45pm. I slept until about 3 in the afternoon making up for the sleep I didn’t get on Thursday night. Then Saturday night I met “S” at Gallos at 9:00pm and we met up with a couple of her co-workers. Then we headed to Kootz where I proceeded to get trashed and I sent a text to most the people in my phone that I was wasted some of you even wrote me back. Then at 1:00am “S” and I left and I got dropped off at Jessy and Gabe’s then they took me home and we played cards for a couple hours. I didn’t get to sleep until 5:00 am. Then I slept all day Sunday waking up for a couple hours here and there for a total of 6 hours of awake time yesterday.

On a side note the cell phone I lost last Saturday was found on my front porch I’m sure the cab driver left it there that night. So I walked by it for almost an entire week before seeing it and then when I did it was frozen to the railing. Oh well it was acting up anyway so I needed a new phone.

Episode LXXXII: “What A Night!”

2007-12-07T16:10:00.000-08:00

Well went out got punched in the face for being an innocent bystander (not hard enough to leave a mark but hard enough to piss me off). I ended a streak that was starting to add up again. Won’t go into detail but let’s just say there is nothing more festive then having sex under a Christmas Tree. My neck was red this morning too not sure what happened exactly with that but I have a few ideas. Big Christmas party tonight – I might even blog about it tomorrow.

Episode LXXXI: “The Must Have Party Accessory”

2007-12-05T11:27:00.000-08:00

I got a text message yesterday afternoon from “S” a girl that had gone out with us last Saturday. She pretty much wanted to make sure I hadn’t wound up in a ditch somewhere Saturday night. I told her I lost my phone but other then that I was good to go. Then I called Lexie to find out what was going on and she said “S” had called her to see she if she wanted to go out this Saturday with her and some people from work. Then apparently she asked if she could borrow me. So I have turned into the must have party favor and Lexie is my pimp. I don’t mind but I might need to start charging a service charge or something.

So this Friday is Christmas Party – have perfect bronze colored dress to wear and will look totally smashing. Saturday is another night out and I have no idea what to wear – I have absolutely no clothes to wear. OK that is not true but I need to find out what the mood is going to be like do I wear another mini skirt or is it going to be more laid back and I should just wear jeans. Decisions, decisions – oh the effort of looking glamorous.

PS - I just sneezed all over my desk and now my brain hurts.

Episode LXXX: “Jingle Bells – Batman Smells”

2007-12-04T16:53:00.000-08:00

OK so along with me having one hell of a night on Saturday night I totally left my cell phone in the cab. That is what happens when you are drunk and distracted by the Big Mac in your hands. So I waited a few days in the hopes that someone would turn it in. No such luck. Now I really wasn’t upset it was time for me to get a new phone anyway but half the phone numbers in there I don’t have anymore. So for those of you whose numbers that have been lost you are currently saved from any random drunk text messages for the time being. Although I think most of the people who read this on a regular basis and who comment you are safe I had all your numbers in my computer. So now I am sporting a new Royal Blue KRAZOR phone it’s totally cute. Although a whole two and a half days without a cell phone was like walking around without a hand.

Anyway tonight I buy a Christmas Tree and decorate it with my fabulous crystal ornaments. I will take a picture and post it later. Also I must rest up our company Christmas party is this Friday and the guys are already talking about who all is going out to party afterward. Personally I hope they all come out after as I will not have to buy a drink all night and I already have my designated driver lined up and he is already scared.

Update

2007-12-03T15:45:00.000-08:00

OK so apparently I would have to take out a full page ad in the Anchorage Daily News to apologize for any embarrassing behavior. Although I don’t want you to think that I only did that stuff because I was drinking I am just more flexible when alcohol is involved. So the above picture is from Jaxx and yes that is my chubby tummy and the afore mentioned love handles. You like it I know you do. Also to nameless man I apologize for back pain but would like to remind you that you stretched out before that or was that after?

Episode LXXIX: “A Great Hair Day.”

2007-12-03T14:43:00.000-08:00

Names have not been used to protect the innocent!

So Saturday I went out with some friends. This picture is of me in the cab ride to Platinum Jaxx my hair looked so good that night. I was all hoed out in a jean mini skirt and brown hoe boots and yes my belly was even showing – apparently the guys love it when your love handles are showing I can’t even tell you how many random guys I danced with but it was all good I had a blast. Then of course I moved to Kootz later in the night to finish off my night. Took a cab home and ended up spending the night in the princess chair until about 8:00am.

Unfortunately the one moment before we went out at which point I knew I was already buzzed was not captured on film. This event which could never be recreated while sober consisted of me jumping on the front of a certain someone (who will remain nameless) telling him to hold me wrapping my legs around his waist and doing that baby thing (you know where they tend to throw themselves backward) which ended up with me hanging from said guys waist upside down with my hands and head by the floor and all this in a mini skirt. Of course being a gentleman said guy did not look down during this (I was wearing a thong which leaves nothing to the imagination) and I am so surprised BFF didn’t launch me out the window.

Not that it was just one big party this weekend I also cleaned the house and moved furniture and I plan on getting a Christmas Tree tomorrow and decorating it.

Episode LXXVIII: “It’s that time of year again.”

2007-11-27T14:07:00.000-08:00

You know that time of year where I want to take a cheese grater to my shins or better yet just cut my legs off at the knee. They are so dry there isn’t enough lotion in the verse to keep me hydrated (of course I know drinking more water this time of year would help but it’s just so tasteless). Also it is now officially the count down to Christmas so I will be avoiding any unnecessary trips anywhere that might remotely be near a retail source. To all my friends and family I love you all very much but don’t get me anything for Christmas because I am not getting you anything because I am broke and I don’t want to feel guilty. You all might get cards if I get around to getting them out but that is about it.

Episode LXXVII: “Thanksgiving SURPRISE!”

2007-11-26T12:21:00.000-08:00

Jiminy Cricket did we get mom good! Don and I had spent the last 5 to 6 weeks planning a surprise trip for me down to Seattle for Thanksgiving. If you have a secret tell Don. No one knew I was coming down but the two of us then earlier last week I told a few of my friends up here in Alaska that I would not be around. So here is what happened.

First after a really horrendous flight down (I hate to fly – I was even tempted to not get on the plane once) I was sure I was going to die like three times there was so much turbulence. I arrived in Seattle at 9:15 on Wednesday night. I’m pretty sure that Grandpa’s spirit was there to greet me when I got off the plane because all of the sudden I had some personality traits back that I had left behind when I had gone home last March to say goodbye to Grandpa. The main one being my attitude and my MOXY! That’s right – I am back to the old Keri. Don met me at baggage claim having left early from the hockey game and we worked out my entrance. He also picked me up in the Jag so even though it was in the 30’s I asked him if we could drive home with the top down. We did and it was fabulous. He dropped me off at the corner so I could wait for him to get inside and then he called me to say everyone was in the hot tub out back. Everyone being mom, Walter and Brenda. So I snuck around back and came barreling through the gate with my new attitude saying “Geez – what’s a girl got to do to get some service around here!” At which point it was dark in the backyard so until I got almost all the way to the hot tub no one recognized me. Mom stood and was speechless (I’m pretty sure if she wasn’t already wet she would have wet her pants). It was so fabulous I gave Don a high five right there. We are such a team. Anyway so that was a great night. Then Thursday morning Tanya called to ask what time she needed to come up from Tacoma and mom handed her the phone and let her talk to me so of course after finding out I was there she had to come right up.

Thursday afternoon we drove up to aunt Laura’s and uncle Brian’s for dinner there was a total of 15 people there it was fun tons of laughing. Me and Tanya drove home together and then she went back home to her puppy. Friday mom and I went shopping at Ross because seriously the universe would be very upset with me if I went to Seattle and didn’t go to Ross – bad Karma! I couldn’t risk it. Then we all hung out on Friday and Brenda and Walter left Friday night. I left to fly home on Saturday afternoon and then proceeded to veg the rest of the weekend. I got my green bean casserole so the world is right with me. Hope everyone else had a great Thanksgiving too.

Episode LXXVI: “Hmm, Well Shit.”

2007-11-19T15:29:00.000-08:00

This is totally my new motto: “Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out screaming ‘WOO HOO what a ride!”

So with this in mind I actually have every intention of sliding in with a Kate Spade purse holding a bunch of the little plastic mermaids that accompany a cocktail made by Joe, Coach Shoes so worn out from dancing you can’t even read the label and my Christian Dior sunglasses (which believe it or not I still have not lost and they currently hold the record for longest lasting sunglasses in the history of Keri) hiding the wrinkles on my face that as of right now have not appeared because I am fabulous.

While we all know I have no problem with my self esteem and I know I am fabulous and I know that you all know I am fabulous. However there are some out there who have not grasp this knowledge (to the random guy standing next to me at the bar wondering where his drink is because he was there first – for like an hour, to the girl at Best Buy who looks confused by the fact that this girl in a pink ski cap and jeans with a big fluffy vest on is getting all the attention from everyone – “I just realized this the other night – apparently I have a great aura”, to the nameless ones out there you know who you are) I AM FABULOUS! And I will beat you over the head with my handbag until you realize it.

So while I realize that I have a certain talent to talk my way in or out of anything (I am pretty sure I could talk my way on to Air Force One if I wanted too). I have decided not to use my power for evil but to help others who I think deserve it so if there is anything any of my peeps need you holla at me and I will let my mojo flow.

Episode LXXV: “Sneaky – Sneaky!”

2007-11-15T17:44:00.000-08:00

OK to all my girls we all know that when we are not in a relationship or we don’t have big plans we tend to let ourselves go sometimes. Well that has happened to me the last week and today I paid for my mistake. I went in to the doctor for a fairly routine reason and that sneaky little man sprung the unmentionable on me. So now as I sit here at work the moment I get home I am taking my 2nd shower of the day and I am going to de-hair-ify myself. Why you ask the damage is already done – because this is apparently why mom always tells you to wear clean underwear. You never know.

Episode LXXIV: “Girls, What’s my Weakness.”

2007-11-08T15:07:00.000-08:00

BIG MACS!

Seriously had one heck of a night last night – had a bad day wanted to kill people. Went out and got completely wasted and was home by 10:30. Short night but filled with my emotional maelstrom that would rival hurricane Katrina. She’s up she’s down she’s mad at everyone she’s crying so hard she’s shaking.

Yeah: Me – Me – Me – I – I –I!

Now anyone that knows me knows I don’t get mad very often I tend to hold it in which isn’t exactly healthy but it works for me. Then about once a year I have a melt down and there usually is a big argument and then I feel better (usually my mom is the one who gets to see this softer side of Keri). Well there was almost one of these full blown episodes last night except all day yesterday everybody could sense I was mad so no one would argue with me and I need to argue to get it out – so now it’s just going to fester and last until I can have a good row with someone. So I guess that was everyone’s warning – stand back.

Episode LXXIII: “SUPER STAR!”

2007-11-05T10:55:00.001-08:00

So I had a blast on Friday night – didn’t even make it home to my own bed. Instead I completely invaded Lexie’s. Tore up her living room and ate her food. It was fabulous I however did pay for it on Saturday with a fabulous hangover. But I vegged all day on Sunday to make up for it. Of course now my own house is trashed and I have to do some major cleaning today. Oh well. At least I know for sure that Lexie is so my home girl who else can you show up at their house at 3:00 am and just invite yourself in. Much love to you girl.

Episode LXXII: “I nearly fainted in the WalMart dressing room.”

2007-11-02T13:58:00.000-07:00

Seriously! I was walking by the jeans section which is the same jeans I have on today. On a whim I decided to try on a pair of size 9 since the ones I have on are a little baggy. I pulled them up and zipped them without having to suck it in and then I’m pretty sure that the people who work there think I’m a big freak because I was like WOOHOO! I haven’t worn that size since my senior year in high school. Damn that was a great year too – oh so much fun. Anyway I just thought I would share with everyone.

By the way I also went tanning on my lunch and now I have that nice burnt smell. I figured out that I only get that smell when I use the tanning lotions but it’s not enough for me not to use it.

A little tanner and skinnier up here in the frozen north.

Episode LXXI: “Boogada Boogada AH AH AH!”

2007-10-31T12:21:00.000-07:00

Well Happy Halloween to everyone. Sorry for the delay in the blogging it’s been kind of hectic and I wasn’t really feeling it.

Here is my question do you believe in premonitions? I do my family has had some pretty strange things happen that lead me to believe in them. So with this in mind I tell everyone that everything is going to be just ducky for me.

Lately I have been catching up on some well needed sleep and just relaxing. I did have a slight melt down on Friday and actually ran away from my own house – is that weird? Have you ever just had the urge to just be by yourself? Well I did Friday. I needed to get away and think I tried to run to my happy place – which is Big Lake because I am always happy when I am out there – however the Big Lake Motel is under remodel and I couldn’t get a room so I had to back track to Wasilla and checked into the Best Western Lake Lucille Inn. I have been to this hotel before so I knew that the suites had a Jacuzzi tub. Well I did it I splurged on a two room suite. It seriously took nearly 45 minutes to fill the tub up because it’s a double but once it was I grabbed my Bacardi Razz and sprite and hopped in and relaxed watching TV (YO Harry Potter) it was the best then I was in bed early and up the next morning at 9:30 am. I woke up and did that whole Disney thing of whipping the curtains open and the view was astounding. One of the sun shiniest days we have had in a while and the lake was mostly frozen over and white and the mountains in the background – I really do love this state. Suddenly my state of mind changed and I was having a really darn good day (impressive considering I am not normally even technically alive at that time in the morning on a weekend). So I drove home and I have been good ever since.

So yes I am still alive and no I have not started my hibernation yet. Hope everyone else is all good – much love.

Episode LXX: “Simon says – WAKE UP!”

2007-10-23T11:56:00.000-07:00

In 89 days it will have been exactly 5 years that I have lived up here in Anchorage (that is so surreal). When I first moved up here I didn’t know anyone and I had no family close by. (I have a grandfather out in Palmer – who I just met when I first moved up here and I had an aunt that lived out in Kenai) For the most part though I was on my own. I had never lived on my own either. So after spending the first couple weeks scared out of my mind in my house trying to get use to the noises I asked the people that I work with to look after me. For some reason I had this irrational fear of me dying alone (which wouldn’t be so bad) but if that happened I was afraid that Pucky would starve to death before anyone realized I was gone.

Now I have never done a “no call, no show” ever in my life. So I told the people I work with that and said that if I was ever more then 30 minutes late and had not called in to call me and if I did not respond in a timely manner to come over to my house and look for me because I am probably dead. Now I have been late and sometimes I have forgotten to change my alarm clock or to set it. However my body usually wakes me up about ten minutes before I have to be to work (usually in panic mode) this function works on the weekends too when I am still asleep and not sure what day of the week it is. This usually gives me enough time to call in and say I am going to be late.

However two weeks ago my alarm didn’t go off and my body didn’t wake me up. So work called me at home 30 minutes after my shift should have started and woke me up. I panic barely got dressed I was so upset I would have totally ran out of the house naked. Now further investigations revealed that my alarm clock was possessed. Now I knew this since it would randomly go off for no reason in the middle of the night or if my cell phone got a message or a call, but it never had not gone off when it was suppose too. So alarm clock was fired. However I was too broke then to go out and buy a new one so I continued to use it while also using my cell phone as a back up because that was not happening again, EVER!

Well to the point of my story – last night I went out and purchased a new alarm clock. When you first get an alarm clock even if you test it the first couple of nights your always worried about it not going off or not going to be loud enough. So last night I set it up but didn’t test it because I figured my backups would be good if it didn’t work. So I set my cell phone and a travel alarm clock both of which are fairly soft alarms they both sort of just annoy you until you wake up. This morning I woke up to what sounded like a direct signal from the system Vega right into my brain. “Simon says get up – NOW!” Of course I jump out of my skin and start flailing about for the snooze button, once I finally get it turned off the other ones start going off. Now I like to snooze plus I was so confused that I couldn’t figure out how to turn anything off. So I snoozed them all and dozed back off. Then again they went off this happened for almost and hour (needless to say my bed companions (dogs, cat, boy) were not real pleased). Oh well I know that I won’t be late again.

Episode LXIX: “Hey Where Did Everybody GO!”

2007-10-22T17:00:00.000-07:00

Well my weekend was good in the long run.

Friday – Well it just sucked – but my girl Lexie was there to save me and brought me over a care package – which included rum and soon everything was just SWELL.

Saturday – I started my evening out by getting dressed up formally to attend a Breast Cancer Charity Ball (I was joined by Lexie and Melody) it was cool the food was awesome ( I am all over that cream sauce). Then we left there and Me and Mel made a quick debut at Kootz in our lovely finery and I do me quick it was the shortest time I have ever spent at Kootz. I however did go home and change and then go back there in the comfort of Yellow Cab. I hung out with my boys in the Swing Bar until they opened – they are trying to get me a job there doing some MIC work (you know hollering at the crowd and pumping everyone up) but that is not all I would have to do and they waited until I was drunk – to lay this one on me. I would also be the cage dancer for the R & B side. Yep that’s right – Shiny! I tried to back peddle my way out saying my body was not good enough for that but they weren’t going for it then I said I didn’t have anything to wear and they mentioned a clothing allowance. (I’ll admit – that got me – until I sobered up the next day – then I was like “What the Hell was I thinking”) Anyway! Thank the powers that be that I didn’t turn the application in that night like I was going too. Serves me right for going there with out my backup.

Well Poppy, Mark and I went back to my house to party and we left Kootz before 11:00. Then we waited on the others to join us which they did about 1:15 am. Then we continued to party all night long. Finally we put in the Transformer movie in at 7:30 am and Poppy and I were passed out on the couch in 15 mins. I woke up at 9 am and looked around wondering where everyone else had gone until I found a note in my kitchen saying they left. Damn – sneaky people. So I retired up to my room and slept until 1 pm. Then we just chilled most of the day on Sunday.

Over the course of Friday Night through Sunday Night I managed to (partially) watch Transformers 4 times. I think I have memorized the movie – but it is an awesome movie.

MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE - I will reign victorious for many years to come.

Episode LXVIII: “I think I can I think I can!”

2007-10-18T14:50:00.000-07:00

OK so I just had a run in with the bionic staple “The Force Is Strong With This One”. It was a long battle and I was starting to get tired and sweaty but I persevered and won out in the end. That staple really just didn’t want to go in the trash. It had become one with the paper but it was no match (OK maybe a little) for me and the jaws of my bright pink staple remover.

Pink my new signature color.

Last night we went bowling and I was using the ugly green ball the guys were using and I was sucking so bad you could have named me Hoover. Finally I decided that I was doing so crappy because the ball was just not girlie enough for me. So I went on a quest (which turned out to be almost as perilous as Atreyu trying to save fantasia). I however had my lucky charm (Atreyu had the Orrin) in the form of my Grandpa’s Navy coat and therefore was able to locate a light 10 pound BRIGHT ASS PINK ball and then I even bowled a couple of strikes.

Moral of this story: If I have any pink – stand back because I am unstoppable!

Episode LXVII: “It’s about that time!”

2007-10-17T16:33:00.000-07:00

That’s right the moment you all have been waiting for – picture from hoed Up night!

That’s right we are still the hotness.

And that's all you get folks!

Episode LXVI: “I Have The BLACK PLAGUE!”

2007-10-15T10:31:00.000-07:00

It has to be that because no normal cold should be able to survive the amount of alcohol I have been drinking. I was so not feeling well on Friday I had this major cold. So I went home and went to bed at 6:00 and slept until 10 then the dogs woke me up to go outside then I was up for about three hours and then I went back to bed at 1 and slept in until noon. It was fabulous. Then I laid around the house on day Saturday and then got ready for the party Saturday night – I made Chicken Cheese Enchilada’s that were pretty darn good if I do say so myself. Most people started showing up around 8:30 to 9:00 and then most of them left at like 10:45 to go to the bar. But it was me, Mikey, Mel and Marcella then Marcella left to go out and me and Mikey proceeded to get down to the Backstreet Boys and Insync – yep that’s right we have no shame we even got Mel to dance a little with us. Well they left at around 11:30 and I stayed and waited for the 2nd group of people to come. They showed up around midnight and we continued to party and when the bars closed down Tammy and Marcella came back in and joined us for a bit and finally I had to kick everyone out at 4:30 because I was done. All and all not a bad party and I got to just chill on Sunday. Back to work and the everyday grind today.

Drunk Blogging!

2007-10-12T00:25:00.000-07:00

Not a good conbo! But I am doing it anyway - so yeah chillin at my house it's a pre party for this Saturday! YeeHaw!

Episode LXV: “It’s COLD!”

2007-10-09T14:31:00.000-07:00

Seriously I had a great night last night so today nothing can burst my bubble.

Had steak last night – it was awesome! I am turning into a fabulous cook – it’s kind of scary actually.

So that is all folks – this is Suzy homemaker signing off.

Episode LXIV: “Holy CRAP Batman!”

2007-10-08T14:16:00.001-07:00

So my blog came to me in my dreams last night and said “YO! Post something before I get all moldy!”

Seriously it has been a busy week. Still no pictures from Hoed Up Night. Sam has moved out and Melody has moved in. Friday found me hanging out at Lexie’s house for a bit getting in my girl time – it was cool lets just say that lots of talking and giggling. A little bit of dress up – that’s right Keri in pink hoe boots and pink lingerie – maybe photos will be posted of that too – MAYBE. Then I went home and before I could go to bed I got a phone call from some friends that wanted to come hang out for a bit to escape some drama. So they ended up hanging out for 3 hours it was really chilled especially since I had all my furniture shoved into the kitchen and dining room because I had my carpets cleaned Friday afternoon. So we sort of threw a blanket down and vegged.

Saturday Melody woke me up at 1:00 pm which was awesome because I needed to get up anyway. So we got together and moved her stuff from the storage place and into my house. Then I proceed to clean like a fiend and right now the only room not clean is the down stairs bathroom I will get to that later. So major moving and then up all night cleaning and then I went to bed at like 4:00am then got up on Sunday to go to work.

Sunday got off of work at 8:15pm and then went to help Mac move – had slight problem with lift gate on the work truck had to call Lance to come rescue me. He fixed it but we had been standing outside for a couple hours and I was chilled to the bone. Went home and took the hottest shower I could stand just to warm up. Yep – winter is here and I am not happy about it.

Lets talk about all the moving I have helped with since I started this blog (go ahead and check back to Memorial Day weekend). Tons! I have bruises all over my body that I don’t remember getting and when you are as white as me they look even worse not to mention I get that red splotchy look when I get cold. So not attractive. Anyway tonight is dinner at my house with a possible mention of helping Mac again tonight if he needs it.

Dinner Menu: I crave red meat! NOW!

Episode LXIII: “Hoed Up Doin Big Thangs!”

2007-10-01T14:25:00.000-07:00

Well let’s see Wednesday night or more accurately Thursday morning 1:30 am found me sitting in the Anchorage International Airport waiting for Melissa’s plane to arrive. I met her outside of security and escorted her to the baggage claim to get her bags. Drove home and threw her into the room and went to bed and was asleep by 2:30 am. Worked Thursday morning and then ended up not going in to BB&B on Thursday night because “was so tired needed nap” so that night we hung out at the house and got some drink on – welcome back to Alaska Melissa this is now the party house. Went to bed at around 4:00 am Friday morning and then woke up to go to work. Dragged my butt around all day and then went home and took a nap woke up just as people started to get to my house for the party. No cooking for Keri I opted out and ordered pizza. We all left from my house around 11:00 to go to Kootz and then I ended up leaving and going home at 12:30 (Yes I left Melissa there with a note for her cab driver as to how to get to my house and my phone number.

12:30 – Get home go to bed.
1:30 – Get a phone call that the guy I left in charge of Melissa was kicked out of the bar because he lost his license in the bar so he was worried about her so he called me. I had a lot of people I knew there so I wasn’t worried about her.
2:45 – Get phone call from cab driver, he can’t find the place and I have to verbally tell him how to get there – I think I should have charged him.
3:30 Melissa gets home and I proceed to completely pass out now that everyone is where they are suppose to be.

I finally got to sleep in until like 1:30 in the afternoon – IT WAS SO AWESOME! I haven’t been able to do that in weeks. At 2:00 we had to run some errands and swing by a Halo party (I stole some fish) and then we finally get back to the house at like 4:30 and then we start getting ready for dressed up night out at 5:30 left house headed back to Halo party (pretended I was hired stripper for the boys since I was dressed like one). Then left them engrossed in the game we barely even phased them. Then headed over to Dallas’s house to say good-bye to Debbie since she is leaving the state today. Then ended back up at my house at 8:00 – proceeded to get our drink on at the house and then called a cab to go downtown to Platinum Jaxx. (Melissa left her ID at the house I made her cab back by herself to get it) So it was me, Melissa and Poppy and we met Lance and Celeste there and then Marcella and Michelle showed up and we all looked awesome in our black dresses or skirts (we really need to do that more often). Then we hung out and then Melissa, Poppy and Me went to Kootz and met up with Mel and then Alexis and Bri Bri showed up and so did Mac and Tippin. We continued to get our drink on and close down the bar. I was DJ Lefty’s personal dancer and spent most of my night up in the DJ booth getting my dance on.

We all got back to the house all 6 of us at about 3:15 and then continued to party and then Mac and Tippin left (I think they might have walked home) at about 5:00am I was in bed and asleep by 6 and then up and awake by 11:30 then we decided to get our Betty Crocker on and I made breakfast (scrambled eggs, sausage, hash browns and Melissa made pancakes). Then we proceeded to lounge around the house all day then I made dinner and I took Melissa to the airport at 11:00 pm Sunday night and then went home and went to bed.

So all in all a good weekend “Big Thangs” and now Melissa really wants to move up here.

Episode LXII: “Pucky looks OK but your tarter sauce doesn’t”

2007-09-25T16:28:00.000-07:00

HA! Anyway – so I am more awake today but I have made the decision to put in my two weeks with BB&B I can’t keep working these hours it is wreaking havoc on my body, I was so tired yesterday I must have ran into 20 different things including a support beam and the coffee pot shelves have totally had it out for me since I started there. So once I decided this a big weight was lifted and I totally feel tons better. I have a little something, something going on the side that if it all works out I will let you all know. (NO I AM NOT SELLING ANYTHING ILLEGAL)

Melissa gets in tomorrow night and then this weekend we have big things planned and there will be pictures to post this time too. It’s going to be one long weekend with all the things I have to go to Saturday especially but there will be drinking and so there will be stories to tell.

PS – I have not been on MySpace in awhile because I am currently mad at GCI so I didn’t pay them but I think they have won the battle because I can’t go any longer without my internet – it’s driving me crazy.

Episode LXI: “Just Shoot Me NOW!”

2007-09-24T14:16:00.000-07:00

Man did I have one hell of a weekend. Friday morning I woke up and went to work from 8 to 5 and then got off and then went home and made my Beer Batter Halibut (which was awesome I might add – you may have noticed there were no smoke signals). Melody and Marcella came over to eat and then Melody went home and Marcella, Me and Poppy went out we started at Platinum Jaxx and were there by 8:30 hung out there until about 10 ish (apparently we missed Tammy and Tool and everyone). We then moved over to the Last Frontier and hung out there for an hour. Then we were going to meet someone at the River City Bar or something in Eagle River – so we drove out there and felt so out of place because me and Marcella were all dressed up for downtown bar hopping and Poppy was of course all ganstered out. Everyone else at this hole in the wall bar was dressed in jeans and hoodies and it was mostly a bunch of country boys. Normally this would not bother me because the Last Frontier is the same way and I feel at home there. But then Poppy made a comment to me and Marcella about being our pimp and being a man he wasn’t seeing the looks these guys were giving us we have never felt like pieces of meat before (only one other time was I this uncomfortable at a bar). Then the person we were supposed to meet didn’t show up in time so we totally bailed after like 20 minutes. So on the way back into town we get a call from Lexie and also Melody and we decide to meet everyone at Kootz. When we get there it is about midnight and the line is so long it’s down the front and around the side of the building. This doesn’t faze me because we all know I don’t have to wait in line. So we walk past and when I got the front door I almost had to throw down on this one girl who had a VIP line pass ticket and she said that even VIP’s had to wait in the line that night – So I gave her the “Oh really? Keri look” and proceeded to walk past her while Poppy and Marcella waited out front and of course the bouncer was like hey and go on in. So when we walked past the girl – I couldn’t help but smile. Normally I am not like that but she didn’t have to say that too me in such a rude tone. Anyway we proceeded to close down the bar that night (On a side note: they were so under staffed for security and I have never seen so many people vomiting in one night in my life and that includes some outrageous house parties I have been too). One guy almost puked on my Ho Boots – lucky for him he missed other wise I would have escorted him out myself – needless to say he didn’t last too long. So we got home around 3:30am Saturday morning and I didn’t get to sleep until 5:00 am then I had to be up at 8:00 to be to work at 9. I worked until 5 and then planned on taking a nap because we had a show to go too that night.

Saturday night after I got off Tool met at the house at 6:00 pm so we could move a car (try steering a vehicle in neutral with it off and see what a work out for your arms this it). So by the time that was done I had to start getting ready for the night (NO NAP FOR KERI). Left the house at 8:00 and we were at Club O by 10:15 for the Arctic Flow Show (which was awesome by the way). Well we stayed at the club until about 1:30 and then ended up at a house and then were going to go to another house but then ended up coming back to house number one. So I got many compliments for being such a cool chick and designated driver. However at 5:30 am Sunday morning Cool Keri had left the building and was replaced by I’m getting tired and have to be up in a few hours Keri. So I finally made it to my bed at 7:00 am and had to get up at 10:00 am to go to work another eight hour day at BB&B didn’t get off until 7:00 pm. Got home and talked to Lexie on the phone for 45 minutes and then my mother and then finally passed out at 9:30 pm. Up at 7:30 and to work at 8:00 – still here and functioning but I also have to work tonight at BB&B until 10:00 pm then I have every intension of going home and passing out until 7:00 tomorrow morning and I will be repeating that schedule for tomorrow as well. Wednesday I just have to work 8 to 5 but Melissa comes in at like midnight so I will be going to the airport to pick her up I might have time to take a nap that day but I really have been slacking on the laundry thing only doing a load here and there and so I really just need to do that. So Thursday will be another 8 to 5 and 5:30 to 10 day and then it will be Friday and I will be having a get together at my house Friday night before heading out to the bar and then Saturday will be another night out – but at least I am off this weekend from BB&B. I guess what I am saying is that you might not be hearing from me until next Monday – don’t panic I am sure with next weekend it will be one heck of a post.

P.S. I’m not sure the second job is worth the $9.50 an hour they are paying me.

Episode XLXX: “I Think My Roman Numerals Might Be Screwed Up – OH WELL!”

2007-09-21T12:19:00.001-07:00

OK so Girl’s Night has not happened yet it keeps being postponed, because I am a bad bad friend.

However tonight I might be cooking – I know scary thought. Very few of you can attest to baring witness to my little secret that I can actually cook – I choose not too most of the time and when I feel I have too I tend to make something that comes out of a box from Costco. However when I put my mind to it and have no other distractions (I have bad cooking ADD) I tend to lay out a good meal and I totally don’t burn it. Tonight it’s Beer Batter Halibut Chunks and made be even home made fries. However if for some reason I do get distracted I will send out a smoke signal in the form of my house burning down – those of you in Seattle will be informed as well by the smoke clogged air that will no doubt fill your skies causing anyone with breathing problems to lock themselves in the house for days. I apologize now for any inconvenience!

Episode XLXIX: “Girl’s Night!”

2007-09-19T14:08:00.000-07:00

Oh My Goodness! It is girl’s night – the three amigo’s are back in action – I am so excited. I will be dining and drinking it up at Casa De Lexie’s and we will be pigging out on Mexican Food and drinking Margarita’s and I will be crashing over there and then driving home in the morning to make it to work. Should be interesting! Maybe there will be pictures to post too. I might even suffer a bout of “PantsPullUpettes!” Stand back old women who lives upstairs above Lexie your worst nightmare has come to your apartment building – I can so take you!

Episode XLXVIII: “Giggles!”

2007-09-18T12:10:00.000-07:00

Well folks I have the giggles today. I am finding the oddest things really funny. Lance has already had to suffer for my amusement. At least he is glad that his miserable day is funny to me and he was able to lift my spirits. No really he is not – he is only 30 minutes into his day and it’s only going to get worse. HA! I’m sorry I find this funny. I have to work tonight ad I don’t find that funny because my knee is just starting to feel better. It’s an old snow boarding injury from a few years ago (thanks Jaime) that would occasionally act up – however since I started the 2nd job it has been continuously hurting. So with this last weekend off it started to feel better. I’m too young to need a knee replacement yet.

UPDATE: So it is three hours into mine and Lance’s day and we are both wanting to kill people. I went out back into the shop in time to see Lance chucking pipe across the warehouse. I snickered and then made a run for it to the relative safety of my office – I guess I am just glad that I am not suffering alone.

Episode XLXVII: “Sweated my butt off in leather pants.”

2007-09-17T11:33:00.000-07:00

So I made it over my emotional hump on Friday night and went to a going away party for Jenn on Saturday. Tammy got us a designated driver (Mikey your awesome) and so by the time they picked me up at my house to go out at 7:45 I had already downed 3 shots. I was all sorts of hoed out in my black leather pants and was looking so hot I wanted to do myself. Then we pull up to the Anchor and it’s just us three for a bit the party girl ends up showing up late to her own party. Then when everyone all showed up it ended up being about 20 people there (I had 2 more shots and two soda’s and a little bit of a pasta dish) then since Lexie and Mel were waiting for us at the Shed we headed over there and I got my dance on (that actually started at the Anchor) and had a “Trash Can” and got a glow in the dark bracelet. I also proceeded to leave my ATM card at that bar – I had to go back the next day to get it. Then since it wasn’t that busy at the Shed we decided to move to Kootz at which point I proceeded to have two more drinks (of something – don’t know Joe made them) and a half a shot of Taste the Rainbow. I did drink one bottle of water but at 1:20 I was drunk and tired and got a cab home to pass out in my own bed. I had a blast though and so have to do it again. Suffered a slight hang over on Sunday though was mostly laid up with this cold and then I met up with Staci and Tammy for dinner at the Moose’s Tooth and then went home and was asleep by ten.

Saturday night was awesome I got in some time with my boys Mikey and Tool who good naturedly let me grind up on them and Mikey became my permanent dance partner until I went home. Apparently I was oblivious to the attention from random guys and just brushed past them much to the annoyance of Lexie but hey – you can ask my mother I have been doing that for years. She use to enjoy walking behind me in the mall to watch people’s reaction to me and me not even paying attention – whatever. Sorry folks I’m not looking right now try back at another time.

Emotions sucks!

2007-09-15T00:27:00.000-07:00

So as I sit here in the dark crying and drinking (I wonder if this means I'm a closet alcoholic - NAW - don't drink enough) so with the good emtions come the bad ones - so I am just chilling wondering what's wrong with me. Who knew! I miss my Grandpa and my girls in Seattle not to mention my family - I haven't been home in too long and when I do it will be weird that my Grandpa won't be there the slient steady rock that was my anchor. I have the whole weekend off from my second job so hopefully I can straighten myself out before Monday. Signing off maybe a another drunk post later in the evening to update all on my current status.